Being a Caddy

People think we just carry the bag around the course for 18holes and then go to the pub. Well I would like to take this opportunity to enlighten the mis-informed that there’s a little more to it.

The job starts as soon as you commit yourself to trying a new career as a caddy. You then have to decide which tour you fancy – obviously we’d all like to be Tiger’s caddy but he didn’t start at the top either so perhaps a less affluent tour and player may well be your starting point.

If you’re lucky enough to make this decision when there happens to be an event a few miles away from your hometown, then good for you. For the rest of us, the first event is usually in Kazakhstan or Outer Mongolia or something.

You have to find out the details of the course then work out the nearest airport. Then book a flight off your own back and then arrange a transfer to the club. You’ll not have the time to settle into a nice swanky hotel room for the afternoon either so you go straight to the course, stand in a queue of experienced caddies and with the greatest of fortune you’ll find a guy/girl stupid enough to try you out for a week. If all this happens you’ve done well already.

Once you have negotiated your fee and relevant percentages you then have to go and see the course you both will spend the next five days traipsing around. This will involve buying a yardage booklet from the yardage book guy. Several Euros lighter you’ll then walk around the course at great length and detail until you know where to go, where not to go, where the greens break, how far each tee shot can go and might – even though you haven’t even seen your player hit a ball thus far.

Three or four hours later you return to your player to have a coffee and get a plan for the week sorted out. After arranging a meeting time the following day for a practice round you have to find a place to stay for the week – no point paying for a week’s accommodation until you have secured a player for the event is there?

So, after trudging around the local town for a few hours you get your room sorted, dine alone and retire pleased you have a bag for the week. Waking at the crack of dawn you head back down the golf course to meet up for a practice round.

Five hours later you’re expected to know everything about the guy/girl’s game, ability, personal makeup, psychological breakdown, family and friends and entire career thus far.

Pro-Am

This is where the caddy not only earns his money but where the misconception that we just lag a bag around for a few rounds hopefully disappears.

If we’ve been fortunate enough to bag a player good enough to play in the pro-am the day before the tournament, a, we’ve done well and won’t mind the extra day’s work but b, will have not only the opportunity to play a second practice round but also gain prior knowledge as to where the first day’s flags will be too.

Whilst the tournament staff are out choosing a suitable location for the hole for the pro-am they will also find another point on the green deemed a reasonable test for the forthcoming field the day after. They’ll mark this point with a red, white or yellow dot painted sometimes as small as a half-penny piece circa '74.

Whilst entertaining the amateurs for the day with wisecracks, individual yardages and yarn upon yarn about life on tour, your second and most important job is to ascertain a game plan with your player. Every course is different and it’s imperative to know how to play each and every hole before it actually matters.

So whilst you plot your way around, you also have to find this red, white or yellow dot. It’s never that easy too. Sometimes you just walk on the green and there it is – sometimes you never find it until the greenkeeper has cut the hole the following day. Some players need to see it, others won't care but for the caddy, it does make it a little easier when the tournament starts to know where the opening round's holes are cut.  

Once you do locate the tiny spot on the immense green you are, providing you don’t disrupt the pace of play and your guests don’t mind, fortunate enough to be allowed to roll a few putts towards it. It’s a huge advantage for the first day's play and a reason why you’ll often find scores will be lower on the first day than any other – certainly those players who play in the pro-am will show better putting stats the following day.

You’ll also be expected to work out the best place to land your approach too - an uphill relatively straight putt being the optimum spot. The last thing you want is to leave a slippery little downhill left to right knee-trembler. 

So once you’ve memorised the track and established a game plan for the week you bid your playing partners for the day a fond farewell and thank them for their support.

The pro-am is often regarded as the most important day of the week - certainly to the organisers. Without the support of the amateurs, the event wouldn’t take place at all. They provide the financial backing, advertising, sponsors and interest the tour requires to make the event happen at all and without them, we’d be playing Sunday medals rather than for prize purses of half a million euros every week.

That evening if you’ve been a very good boy you’ll receive a text message from your player indicating what time you’re playing on the first day of the tournament. She (I’ll go with ‘she’ for now or writing he/she will become rather tedious for you all) will have received one immediately after the tour has made the draw. There are two options – early/late or late/early. Early/late means you’ll be playing early Thursday morning and then late on Friday afternoon. I shouldn’t have to explain the second option but for those not keeping up it means you have a lie in Thursday and up at the crack of dawn Friday.

Some players prefer one or the other but it does tend to work out fairly evenly throughout the year so not worth kicking up a fuss if you get drawn one more than the other. The only thing that makes a difference is the weather; should a wet front wander by late Thursday afternoon and then dissipate by Friday lunchtime you could get all of it or none of it at all. That’s just unfortunate.

So armed with your tee time you head out for dinner and prepare for the following day. If I’m honest there isn’t a whole lot more you can do at this stage as a caddy - it’s really up to the player from here on.

Providing you turn up on time and have ascertained what the weather might do to affect the flight of the ball on each hole your job as a caddy is pretty much done – just gotta pop the 30lb tour bag on ya shoulder and shut up for the next four hours eh?

Um… no.

You may have done the prep but now you really start working.